Speaking out

This may come as a shock to some of you, but parenting is probably my lifes greatest challenge. I dont enjoy it and really struggle to be a good mom. I have two kids who I know were given to me for a reason... to drive me crazy, but also to strengthen me and humble me.
Its easy to dish out advice on how to be a good parent. When I was just married, and even before that, I had in my head the type of parent I was going to be. I thought I was pretty realistic, too... That is, until I had two kids. I see mothers all around me having 3, 4, 5, and even 6 kids. I ask my self "how do they do it and stay sane?!" I think I would drive myself off a cliff! I know I was blessed with many gifts and talents from God, but patients is not one of them.
This may be my "depression" talking, but I find it hard to have joy in your life when your kids are fighting at 6 in the morning, or when you are trying to make a special date and go out for ice cream just for the kids to act up and misbehave, or when you think you are going to have some nice family time and read a book just to have your kids scream at each other on who gets to snuggle with mom or talk over you while you read. Is it just my kids that argue with me nonstop, all day every day, 24/7?! I tell them we are going to drive to the post office and they freak out and start throwing themselves on the floor like they didnt know any better.
I've tried taking "mommy time-outs" in the car, but the kids seem to just follow me. I cant even take a shower without the kids coming in and screaming that Luke hit Kylee or Kylee hit Luke. I hate to say it, but I cant wait for school to start again!
I know some of you may judge me, but I am writing this for those who may be struggling as well. I want to speak out for moms and let them know that they cant vent and that they dont have to be a "perfect" mom all the time.
Moms, its time to speak out!